“Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.”
Well in this case, I’ve been fooled upwards of seven times. So who is the fool now?
Am I the fool for being a sucker for not only love, but for the only person I have truly been in love with? Is he the fool to keep coming back to me when it always turns out I’m not the one he wants? Or are we both the fools? Fools for falling for each other all over again just to end things as quickly as they started.
It’s never been hard to understand when to draw the line, but how? How do you completely let go of all hope that anything will ever become of that special relationship again? How do you stop comparing every guy you meet to him? What is the 12-step recovery program after a break-up from your first true love?
You’ll always remember that feeling of being so in love it almost hurts. You can never physically or emotionally get close enough because you always crave more from that person. You can’t get enough.
Too often this feeling and craving results in seeming “possessive” or “crazy,” but that’s not at all what it is intended to be. It’s supposed to be a sign of love, care, respect because you would literally do anything for that person. You put them before yourself.
But, what happens when that person you put before yourself doesn’t put you before them?
Anger, aggression, misunderstanding, miscommunication.
So maybe this is the first step in recovering… Recognizing.
Recognizing that neither one of you is a fool. You’re just human. You feel things you don’t want to feel and love people who may not love you back.
Recognizing that it’s a beautiful thing you have the capacity to love someone to that magnitude even if it wasn’t reciprocated.
Then… recognizing that someone, someday will come into your life that has the same capacity to love as you and there will be even more fire.